Every once in a while I will get something from a friend in my email that is so freaking funny I have to post it. This week, this post is from my mom. I couldn’t stop laughing in agreement to some of these.
“Blinds are like regulars now.”
No shit. Thank you, Midol.
Damn blondes and their tampons.
What? You mean, like, in his ass?
Drink your ass stupid on chocolate.
Damn house fairies, always making the place smell better and look much more like a cruise ship…
I’ve seen this movie. It was an accident. I kept thinking the girls were late.
That’s right, unless I’ll have to get you a free catalog for chubbies.
And I thought I would have been good with some cooking supplies…
I had no idea that vaginas had gums.
“If we can make this shower smaller we could almost kiss.”
Dentist offices are finally a place people want to go.
Or you could just smack the shit outta her.
Sure, learn your kids good, but you can’t get decent reception to call in and get your kid out of class when there is a Mr. Ed Marathon.
Just like kids.
This is why all babies look like mutant aliens.